the_mom_test.md

The Mom's Test

by Rob Fitzpatrick

Rule of thumb: If it's a topic you both care about, find an excuse to talk about it. Your idea never needs to enter the equation and you'll both enjoy the chat.

Rule of thumb: Kevin Bacon's 7 degrees of separation applies to customer conversations. You can find anyone you need if you ask for it a couple times.

The framing format I like has 5 key elements.

• You're an entrepreneur trying to solve horrible problem X, usher in wonderful vision Y, or fix stagnant industry Z. Don't mention your idea.
• Frame expectations by mentioning what stage you're at and, if it's true, that you don't have anything to sell.
• Show weakness and give them a chance to help by mentioning your specific problem that you're looking for answers on. This will also clarify that you're not a time waster.
• Put them on a pedestal by showing how much they, in particular, can help.
• Ask for help.

Or, in shorter form: Vision / Framing / Weakness / Pedestal / Ask The mnemonic is "Very Few Wizards Properly Ask [for help]."

About meetings

Changing the context of the meeting to "looking for advisors" is the equivalent of throwing out all your chocolate when you start a diet. You change the environment to naturally facilitate your goals.

Rule of thumb: Keep having conversations until you stop hearing new stuff.

Rule of thumb: If you aren't finding consistent problems and goals, you don't yet have a specific enough customer segment.

Customer Slicing.

You take a segment and then keep slicing off better and better sub-sets of it until you've got a tangible sense of who you can go talk to and where you can find them.

1. Start with a broad segment and ask: Within this group,

• Which type of this person would want it most?
• Would everyone within this group buy/use it, or only some of them?
• Why do they want it? (e.g. What is their problem or goal)
• Does everyone in the group have that motivation or only some of them? What additional motivations are there?
• Which other types of people have these motivations?

2. Next we're going to look at our groups' behaviours and figure out where to find them.

• What are these people already doing to achieve their goal or survive their problem? Where can we find our demographic groups?
• Where can we find people doing the a
• bove workaround behaviours?
• Are any of these groups un-findable?If so, go back up the list and slice them into finer pieces until you know where to find them. 3.Now that we have a bunch of who-where pairs, we can decide who to start with based on who seems most:
• Profitable
• Easy to reach
• Rewarding for us to build a business around

You have to choose someone who is specific and who also and meets the three big criteria of being reachable, profitable, and personally rewarding.

Rule of thumb: Good customer segments are a who-where pair. If you don't know where to go to find your customers, keep slicing your segment into smaller pieces until you do.

Running the process

You need to do a little bit of work before and after to extract full value. (from customer conversations)

Avoiding bottlenecks has three parts: prepping, reviewing, and taking good notes.

Prepping

Your most important preparation work is to ensure you know your current list of 3 big questions.

If you've already learned the facts of your customer and industry, then you should also know what commitment and next steps you are going to push for at the end of the meeting.

Spend up to an hour writing down your best guesses about what the person you're about to talk to cares about and wants. You'll probably be wrong, but it's easier to keep the discussion on track and hit important points if you've created a skeleton.

Prep questions to unearth hidden risks: If this company were to fail, why would it have happened? What would have to be true for this to be a huge success?

Rule of thumb: If you don't know what you're trying to learn, you shouldn't bother having the conversation.

Reviewing

After a conversation, just review your notes with your team and update your beliefs and 3 big questions as appropriate.

Ensure the learning is now on paper and in everyone's head

Talk about the meta-level of the conversation itself:

• Which questions worked and which didn't?
• How can we do better next time?
• Were there any important signals or questions we missed? This stuff is more craft than science: you have to actively practice it to get better.

Disseminate learnings to your team as quickly and as directly as possible, using notes and exact quotes wherever you can. It keeps you in sync, leads to better decisions, prevents arguments, and allows your whole team to benefit from the learning you've worked so hard to acquire.

Who should show up? Everyone on the team who is making big decisions (including tech decisions) needs to go to at least some of the meetings.

Taking notes

Where to write it down You want to take your customer notes so that they are:

• Able to be sorted, mixed, and re-arranged
• Able to be combined with the notes of the rest of your team
• Permanent and retrievable
• Not mixed in with other random noise like todo lists and ideas

Rule of thumb: Notes are useless if you don't look at them.

Key skills:

• Asking good questions (Chapters 1 & 3)
• Avoiding bad data (Chapter 2)
• Keeping it casual (Chapter 4)
• Pushing for commitment & advancement (Chapter 5)
• Framing the meeting (Chapter 6)
• Customer segmentation (Chapter 7)
• Prepping & reviewing (Chapter 8)
• Taking notes (Chapter 8)

The Mom Test:

1. Talk about their life instead of your idea
2. Ask about specifics in the past instead of generics or opinions about the future
3. Talk less and listen more

Getting back on track (avoiding bad data):

• Deflect compliments
• Anchor fluff (when did this really happen? give me an example)
• Dig beneath opinions, ideas, requests, and emotions

Mistakes and symptoms:

• Fishing for compliments
  • "I'm thinking of starting a business... so, do you think it will work?"
  • "I had an awesome idea for an app — do you like it?"
• Exposing your ego (aka The Pathos Problem)
  • "So here's that top-secret project I quit my job for... what do you think?"
  • "I can take it — be honest and tell me what you really think!"
• Being pitchy
  • "No no, I don't think you get it..."
  • "Yes, but it also does this!"
• Being too formal
  • "So, first off, thanks for agreeing to this interview. I just have a few questions for you and then I'll let you get back to your day…"
  • "On a scale of 1 to 5, how much would you say you…"
  • "Let's set up a meeting."
• Being a learning bottleneck
  • "You just worry about the product. I'll learn what we need to know."
  • "Because the customers told me so!"
  • "I don't have time to talk to people — I need to be coding!
• Collecting compliments instead of facts and commitments
  • "We're getting a lot of positive feedback."
  • "Everybody I've talked to loves the idea."

The process before, during and after the meeting:

• If you haven't yet, choose a focused, findable segment

• With your team, decide your big 3 learning goals

• If relevant, decide on ideal next steps and commitments

• If conversations are the right tool, figure out who to talk to

• Create a series of best guesses about what the person cares about

• If a question could be answered via desk research, do that first

• Frame the conversation

• Keep it casual

• Ask good questions which pass The Mom Test

• Deflect compliments, anchor fluff, and dig beneath signals

• Take good notes

• If relevant, press for commitment and next steps

• With your team, review your notes and key customer quotes

• If relevant, transfer notes into permanent storage

• Update your beliefs and plans Decide on the next 3 big questions

Results of a good meeting:

• Facts — concrete, specific facts about what they do and why they do it (as opposed to the bad data of compliments, fluff, and opinions)
• Commitment — They are showing they're serious by giving up something they value such as meaningful amounts of time, reputational risk, or money.
• Advancement — They are moving to the next step of your real-world funnel and getting closer to a sale.

Signs you're just going through the motions:

• You're talking more than they are
• They are complimenting you or your idea
• You told them about your idea and don't know what's happening next
• You don't have notes
• You haven't looked through your notes with your team
• You got an unexpected answer and it didn't change your idea
• You weren't scared of any of the questions you asked
• You aren't sure which big question you're trying to answer by doing this
• You aren't sure why you're having the meeting

Writing it down — signal symbols: (for quick note taking)

• :) Excited
• :( Angry
• :| Embarrassed
• ☇ Pain or problem (symbol is a lightning bolt)
• ⨅ Goal or job-to-be-done (symbol is a soccer/football goal)
• ☐ Obstacle
• ⤴ Workaround
• ^ Background or context (symbol is a distant mountain)
• ☑ Feature request or purchasing criteria
• ＄ Money or budgets or purchasing process ♀
• ♀ Mentioned a specific person or company
• ☆ Follow-up task

Signs you aren't pushing for commitment and advancement:

• A pipeline of zombie leads
• Ending product meetings with a compliment
• Ending product meetings with no clear next steps
• Meetings which "went well"
• They haven't given up anything of value

Asking for and framing the meeting:

• Vision — half-sentence version of how you're making the world better
• Framing — where you're at and what you're looking for
• Weakness — show how you can be helped
• Pedestal — show that they, in particular, can provide that help
• Ask — ask for help The big prep question: "What do we want to learn from these guys?"